Steve Jobs appeared in front of a stunned crowd for the unveiling of the new iPhone, but their reaction wasn't a result of the device's radical new look. In fact, while the outward appearance of the iPhone hasn't changed at all--what's new is the sharp new applications it's loaded with.

The crowd was amazed to see a tiny man (in the trademark black turtleneck) appear from behind a curtain and walk toward the front of the stage--the glistening new iPhone in his hands. Yes, hands. It only took seconds for audience members to realize that it was indeed Steve Jobs, Apple Inc.'s inimitable CEO. They were confused, though, as to why one of the most formidable tech innovators seemed to stand no more than two feet high on the stage.

"I couldn't believe it was him," said a Gizmodo Reporter in response to Steve's stature. "I mean, I think half the crowd thought the coffee and donuts were spiked with LSD. But when Steve explained everything, of course we were awed and amazed all over again."

Jobs took the stage at 1/6 his normal size, making the new iPhone he was carrying appear to be some kind of futuristic tablet computer.

The explanation? This new release of the iPhone has applications that can physically distort the user's body by making them denser, by changing their elemental composition, by making them grow, or--as Mr. Jobs demonstrated with the application aptly titled "iPym"--by making them shrink.